Armageddon and Archeaology

ARMAGEDDON AND ARCHEAOLOGY

I hear that archaeologists, when they’re digging to do research about a lost civilization, really hit pay dirt when they end up hitting the places where these ancient people threw away their garbage. No, think of it, you know one man’s garbage is another man’s treasure. I mean it’s a concentration of that civilization’s material culture, all in one place. So just imagine, when western civilization perishes, with all this global warming, 2012 crap, and alien agendas, we’ll soon get taken over by some X-file-type scenario.

Then our civilization will get hammered by some ugly green little men with ooze coming out of their ears and noses, assuming they have noses and ears, and they’ll get to sift through our garbage, right? Imagine the crap they’ll find: GI Joes with life-like hair, Barbie and Ken dolls, Big Jim sports campers, Rock ‘em sock ‘em robots, Hot Wheels, Lego, and my all time favourite: Sex toys!!!

They’ll find a huge assortment of used inflatable latex dolls with vibrating vaginas. (Like, wouldn’t you be too exhausted to have sex with her after taking the trouble to blow her up? Or does she come with a portable compressor? Is the compressor electrical, or battery operated? Are batteries included? Enquiring minds want to know!!!)

Not to mention all of the other sex toys like cock rings, dildos, hand cuffs, cat o’ nine tails, and so on. These little green guys will probably come to the conclusion that we were a very advanced bunch of people, in all ways, very rich in our material culture, and very preoccupied with the pursuit of self-seeking hedonistic pleasure.

Like Joe Bocan said ‘Apocalypso: Dansez jusqu’à la fin du monde’. Looks like we’re going to be going’ at it with a vengeance until the very end, dancing, eating, drinking, and copulating with the best of Roman orgiastic decadence.

Hopefully the little green men who come after us won’t get too many bad ideas from our garbage. Hopefully they’ll take the good, and leave the bad and the ugly to rot in the dustbin of history.

After all, who wants to inflate something inanimate, defile it, and then throw it away? (Quite a few people around here, which is what worries me. I think I’ll leave that one for the little green men to deal with at the appointed time and place.)

God Bless you all.

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